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White Plains New York Family Law Blog

How do you prove abuse is taking place?

You love your children, but you do not love the way your ex-spouse treats them. You've long suspected that some abuse is taking place behind closed doors, but you see your children only a few times a month. As a result, even if they were harmed, it would be hard for you to know without them telling you directly.

You want to go back to court to seek primary custody because your ex-spouse has been talking about moving away with your children. That's not something you want to see happen, especially because you're worried about their safety.

Divorces range based on city, suvey reports

One interesting thing to read about is how where you live and the people you're around could influence your relationship. A March 4 news article describes the divorce rates of the United States and where they're the highest.

Of Americans who are 15 or older, approximately 10.9 percent have been married and divorced but have not chosen to remarry. Another 2 percent are separated but not yet divorced.

Fault-based or no-fault divorce? Which is better?

In many cases, people choose to enter into no-fault divorces. They decide that it's fair because while one person might have been more to blame than another, both parties contributed to the breakdown of the marriage.

In a no-fault divorce, neither party takes full responsibility for the end of a marriage. In court, you don't have to show any fault to prove wrongdoing, either, which makes it easier to proceed with your divorce without blaming either party.

Know the role of child support in your child's life

Child support can be used for many things, despite the fact that some people claim it should be used only for a child's direct needs. At the end of the day, children need many things from shelter to food to clothing. Each of these items is costly, and support is there to help the custodial parent buy those items.

Support doesn't only have to go to a child's direct activities or needs, though. It can also be used to rent a better apartment or to purchase furniture for better living conditions. It can be used for extracurricular activities and for medical expenses. Essentially, support can be used for almost anything.

Teachers: Sometimes part of your custody discussions

Teachers sometimes get caught in the middle of custody disputes between parents. As a parent, it's important for you to understand that any teacher involved in your child's life is going to be on your child's side, not yours or your ex-spouse's.

The goal of any good teacher is to make sure your child is protected and safe. This includes reporting signs of abuse, neglect or trouble in the home. The teacher will likely know about your divorce, and they may even be asked to testify about your involvement in your child's life.

Is it worth proving a fault in divorce?

When you know that your spouse has wronged you, you may wish to take it out on them through a divorce. However, it's important to know how seriously alleging a fault is taken and if it's really worth the trouble. In many cases, being able to prove a fault isn't going to do much in itself other than speed up the divorce process. However, if you have enough evidence, accusing your significant other of a fault and entering into a fault-based divorce could work out in your favor as you divide your assets.

As an example, imagine how offended you would be to find out that your spouse had cheated on you. Your savings account is drained, and you realize that the late nights at the office were all spent out with your spouse's mistress. As a result, there are fewer assets to go around, which is infuriating (to say the least).

What should you do to prepare for divorce?

Divorce can take its toll on a person in many ways. It can affect a person mentally, emotionally, financially and even physically. It can affect your children, your friends, your work and your hobbies. There are so many ways divorce can affect a person’s life and it can feel overwhelming.

However, there are certain ways you can lessen the negative consequences of a divorce. Being well prepared may help reduce the strain and stress of the process.

Address parental alienation the moment it appears in your case

Parental alienation is a concern many parents have when they begin going through a divorce with children. They sometimes worry that their estranged spouse may be manipulating their children or doing things that make them appear "bad" or "evil" to their kids. Young children are particularly impressionable, sometimes turning their backs on the parents who have been made out to be dangerous or harmful to them.

If you are worried about parental alienation, you're not alone. Many good parents are concerned that they'll lose contact with their children or be villainized during the divorce. It isn't fair to have to worry about that.

Not all prenuptial agreements are valid, so check yours

Prenuptial agreements are a great idea for couples who are getting married. You felt so strongly about having one that you asked your spouse to sign one, too. Now that you're getting a divorce and have one of your own, you want to make sure it will hold up in court.

There are a few things you should know about a prenuptial agreement that can help you know if it's going to stand in court. For example, the fairness of the prenuptial agreement matters. In most states, both parties are expected to disclose all their assets, and both people must have had their own attorneys before signing.

Choose the right divorce for your situation

There are two kinds of divorce you can choose between, fault and no-fault. These types of divorces are only a little bit different, but those small differences could help you decide which is the best option for your situation.

With no-fault divorces, you're showing that neither party is to blame for the divorce. You'll agree to a separation based on an irretrievable marital breakdown. Neither party will accuse the other of abuse, neglect, affairs or other negatives.